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Fascinating Footnote:  The Goose Down Divorce

After thirty seven years of living together, Uncle Hamilton and Aunt Julia Grubbs of Lawrenceburg, Indiana, separated at Aunt Julia's request.  Their six children were not surprised. They knew that their parents had not spoken to each other since 1884.  It was now 1905.

It fell to Judge George E. Downey to decide the divorce case and he soon became acquainted with the facts of this unusual action.  Uncle Ham Grubbs was 65 and Aunt Julia 60, a time they should have been enjoying their golden years together. Instead, they were suing for divorce.  They had been married for 37 years and lived together all of that time.  They had raised a family of six children, but had not spoken to each other for 21 years, since 1884.  Friends and neighbors who had hoped the breach of 21 years would be healed by time were disappointed. They had not spoken to each other since the quarrel in 1884, although they occupied the same house and ate three times a day at the same table.

The beginning of Aunt Julia and Uncle Ham's lives together didn't foretell the unhappy ending.  Forty plus years before in 1865, everyone in Moore's Hill District knew that Ham Grubbs doted on Julia Harris.  Everyone considered Ham a likely young farmer and a good catch, and Julia Harris was the prettiest girl around.  Ham courted Julia and beat out all of the other young fellows in the district.  They were married on May 27, 1868.  The country folks from miles around rode or walked to attend the Grubbs wedding.  Reverend Benjamin Plummer, one of the old‑time clergymen of the Methodist‑Episcopal Church in southeastern Indiana, pronounced the knot tied.

Everyone wished the young couple happiness, long life, and prosperity.  Their good wishes for the couple came true for a good many years.  Uncle Ham and Aunt Julia were blessed with six children, and not one death reduced their home circle.  Many of the world's goods came their way.  Uncle Ham, as he came to be known throughout Miller Township, was a hard worker and a smart farmer.  Gradually he increased his holdings until he was the owner of 110 of the best acres in all the township.  He had the finest house, the most head of stock, the best up‑to‑date implements and the prettiest wife in all the county.

For fifteen years everything ran smoothly‑ years that brought more prosperity and more children.  In 1884, Ella, the last child, arrived.  She was still a baby in her mother's arms when trouble came and never left.  The quarrel that brought an end to the happiness of the Grubbs family began with the arrival of a peddler.  One summer afternoon he happened along to Uncle Ham and Aunt Julia's place, driving his cart. He spied a fine flock of geese and stopped to look them over.  Uncle Ham came out of the house and agreed with the peddler that they were the finest geese in all of Indiana.

"What do you want for them?" the peddler asked.

Uncle Ham named a good round figure.  The sum he wanted amounted to more than the market value of the geese and enough to add a goodly amount to the Grubbs bank account, an account that grew healthier year by year.  They closed the bargain, just as Aunt Julia appeared in the farmhouse door.

"Say, what's that man want with my geese, Ham?" she called.

"He's buying them," Uncle Ham told her. "It's all right, mother.  He's paying all they're worth.”

"Now don't you do no such a thing Ham Grubbs!" Aunt Julia cried.  She hurried down to the shade tree the men stood under while they bargained.  "I've been saving those geese for their down.  I'm going to make feather beds out of it."

"Now see here, Jule," her husband said.  "This man is paying a good stiff sum for these geese.  We can raise more of them.  Besides, I never slept under a feather bed and I never will."

"Well, Ham Grubbs, I have and I'm going to do it again!"Aunt Julia retorted hotly.  "I don't care what you do."

Ham Grubbs wanted to add to his bank account and his wife wanted her feather beds.  One hasty word led to another. The quarrel ended with Aunt Julia flouncing back to the farmhouse and the peddler carrying off the geese, for which he paid Uncle Ham's price.   When Ham Grubbs returned to the house, he found Aunt Julia still spluttering.  They exchanged more words and Uncle Ham said something he shouldn't have said.

"I'll never speak to you again!" declared Aunt Julia.

"All right.  Do as you like," Uncle Ham answered.  All of the children heard the quarrel and the ones old enough to understand started to cry.  Their crying stopped the hot words but not the passionate feelings.

"Don't worry about them, Ham Grubbs," snapped Aunt Julia.  "I'll stay here in the same house with you until every one of them is grown up and then we can see what we'll do.  But don't you speak to me."

"All right, I won't," answered Ham Grubbs.

From that moment on, they didn't say a word to each other.  Soon the neighborhood gossips heard about Uncle Ham and Aunt Julia agreeing never to speak again.  They speculated, but eventually agreed that time would bring a reconciliation and everything would work out.  Instead, the chasm between Uncle Ham and Aunt Julia widened.  The children grew older and began to take sides.  This made matters worse.

Day after day Ham and Julia Grubbs sat at the same table and ate with their six children, but never spoke a word to each other.  Uncle Ham worked constantly and well, making his farm better and better.  He gradually added to his wealth until he owned the farm free and clear and above and beyond that had $15,000 cash in the bank.

In the meantime, Aunt Julia did her share of the work. She made the children's clothes and saw that they went to school.  She kept the house as spotless as hard work and plenty of soap and water could do.  She made the beds, cooked the meals, and made the butter and cheese.  She didn't leave anything undone that the most loving wife could do to add to her husband's worldly goods.  But through all of the hard work, Uncle Ham and Aunt Julia never spoke a word to each other.

One by one the children grew up, until only the youngest, Ella, remained at home.  Two of the children went to Kansas, two to Illinois, and one to Ohio.  They all married and prospered.  Since she remained at home, Ella became the intermediary between her father and mother.  Every effort she made to convince them to forget the quarrel ended in failure.  Whenever her parents had to consider important matters, Ella served as spokeswoman between them.

In July of 1905, Ella celebrated her 21st birthday and decided to leave home.  This marked the end of the truce agreement between Uncle Ham and Aunt Julia.  Aunt Julia made up her mind that she would no longer live with Uncle Ham.  She would go to the home of one of her sons in Illinois who had sided with her in the long quarrel. The census records state that Aunt Julia lived with her daughter Ella in Illinois, but the newspaper stories say that she lived with her son. She definitely no longer lived with Uncle Ham.

Ella told her father, who was now 65, the news.  He protested vigorously.  He had become used to the silent relationship between him and his wife.  He couldn't see how he would get along without her to do the housework.  He said that she couldn't go.  Who would take her place?   This statement was the last straw for Aunt Julia, now 60 years old.  She decided to sue for divorce.  She served papers on Uncle Ham, charging him with cruel and inhuman treatment.  She charged that Uncle Ham had cursed her in the presence of their children and had said other things to her which no good husband would say to his wife.

The Grubbs had a hearing before Judge George E. Downey who investigated and discovered no hope of reconciliation between them, although their quarrel was 21 years old.  He granted a divorce decree and a judgment of $2,000 alimony which Uncle Ham promptly paid.  Aunt Julia departed for the home of her son in Illinois.  Uncle Ham remained at the old homestead where he vowed he would end his days alone.    The gossips of Miller Township still speculated about bringing the old couple together again, but without much hope. For once, the gossips were right.  Uncle Ham and Aunt Julia never reconciled, and their divorce remained on record as one of the oddest cases in southeastern Indiana.

Based on a story in the Ironwood Times, July 29, 1905, and the Sedalia Missouri Bazoo, June 1904.

http://newspaperarchive.com/ironwood-times/1905-07-29/page-2

 

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All of the material on this website is copyrighted.  You are free to link to any of the articles and to download any of the PDF books to read and use as long as you credit me as the author.       kathywarnes@gmail.com
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  • Frances Ellen Watkins Harper Fought for Human Rights
  • Mary Fields, Stage Coach Mail Driver, Sharp Shooter, Faithful Friend
  • Lucy Parsons, "More Dangerous Than A Thousand Rioters"
  • Lydia Maria Francis Child Travels 'Over the River and Through the Wood'
  • Anti-Suffragists Believed Women Didn't Need the Right to Vote
  • Finland's Alexandra Gripenberg Sought Universal Women's Rights
  • From Frances Slocum to Little Bear Woman and Back Again
  • Madame Elisabeth Thible is the First Woman to Ride in a Free Floating Balloon
  • Veronica Kerler Frank Pined for Germany, But Made Milwaukee Her Home
  • Mary Humphreys Stamps, Undefeated Rebel with An Educational Cause
  • Sister Monica Is One of Milwaukee, Wisconsin's Early Pioneers
  • A Love Story for St. Valentine's Day - Marie Antoinette and Count Axel von Fersen
  • Three Wisconsin Women of the Waves
  • Margaret Fox Kane and her Victorian Love Story
  • Francoise Marie Jacquelin, Lioness of La Tour, Lioness of Acadia, Woman in Her Own Right
  • Mary Breckinridge, Circuit Riding Nurse and Founder of the Frontier Nursing Service
  • Women Bicyclists Break Their Glass Cages and Ride into Liberation
  • Maria Mitchell, America's First Woman Astronomer Demonstrated Female Scientific Aptitude
  • Queen Alexandra of Great Britain-Queen Victoria's Daughter-in-Law, Bertie's Patient Wife, and Her Own Person!
  • Chicagoan Kate Kellogg Meets a Ghost on a Train
  • Isobel Lillian Steele Went to a Party and Ended Up in a Nazi Jail
  • Madam Sophie Blanchard - "Official Aeronaut of the Restoration"
  • Women of Their Time and Place
    • Nadine Turchin Fights Alongside Her Husband in the Civil War
    • War Stories Along Lake Erie: Ordinary Women Experience the War of 1812
    • Katie Walker Tends Robbins Reef Light Near the Statue of Liberty
    • Maria Gulovich Joined the Czech Resistance
    • Pirate Fanny Campbell Freed Her Fiance and Fought the British
    • SOE Agent Andree Borrel Lived Several Lifetimes in Her 24 Years
    • Lydia Latrobe Roosevelt and the First Mississippi River Steamboat
    • Sophie Kwiatkowski Served as a New Guinea Nurse in World War II
    • Clara Zetkin Spoke Against Hitler in the German Reichstag
    • Gertrud Scholtz-Klink, Female Fuhrer, Breathed Her Nazi Beliefs
    • Nancy Leo , the Only Woman Buried in Luxembourg American Cemetery
    • Dickey Chapelle, Journalist and War Correspondent
    • Lucena Brockway Adapts to Life in the Keweenaw Copper Mining Country of Lake Superior
    • Does Mary Surrat's Ghost Haunt the Senate Chambers Seeking Justice?
    • The Ghostly Cyclist in Brooklyn's Prospect Park
  • Women of Contemporary 20th and 21st Century Complexion
    • Clara Ward Chimay, Gilded Age Princess
    • Ruth Becker's Faith Helps Her Survive the Titanic and Beyond
    • Mildred Beltmann , Wartime Wife
    • The Courage of their Cultural Convictions - Women Missionaries in China
    • Light and Radiance - Laurence Owen and Her Sabena Fellow Travelers
    • Edna St. Vincent Millay, Passionate Poet, Candle-Lit Feminist
    • Fascinating Footnote: The Goose Down Divorce
    • Olive Higgins Prouty Juggles to Balance Home and Career
    • Mother and Daughter Journalists Agnes Meyer and Katharine Graham Shaped Journalism
    • Rose Friedman and the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory Fire
    • Katharine Meyer Graham Leaves Her Mark on the Washington Post
    • Ida M. Tarbell, "Bachelor Soul," Transitional Woman, or Both?
    • Nurse Edith Cavell, the Courage to Die for Her Country
    • Sigrid Schultz Outsmarted Hermann Goering
    • Martha Dickie Sharp Saves Jewish Refugees from the Nazi Death Machine
    • Virginia Graham Pioneered in Early Television and Survived Cancer
    • Rose Conway, President Harry Truman's Secret Weapon
    • Nancy Green, Talented Entrepreneur, Transitional Symbol
    • "Surrender on Demand:" The Friendship of Mary Jayne Gold and Miriam Ebel
    • Julia K. Tibbitts - Closet Environmentalist
    • Lee Lawrence Ansberry Reconquers the World and Reshapes Her Life
  • Christmas Cheer